Stay strong guys <3
Well. I’m down another jeans size from fat loss. I’ve never been so strong physically, and I have 6 weeks left in Uni before I get a job in Physics:)
Was at the hospital today for a routine check on everything. My doctor couldn’t believe it when he seen me. Long story short I don’t have to go back ever again, My sleep apnea has practically been cured. My asthma has disappeared even tho I stopped taking my medication just over a year ago. My blood pressure is back to being perfect and I’ve managed to maintain fat loss for the last 13 months now:P Hope I’ll never have to see another fucking psychiatric consultant ever again!
All this is great, but the biggest changes (and personally the best) in me are all in my head. I’ve actually started seriously dating again. I brought girls bowling, to the cinema, to pubs, to libraries, galleries and to science talks lol And have been having an absolute fantastic time with them as well:)
Confidence has increased, motivation and discipline are both getting stronger by the minute. Still no progress dealing with trust issues…but what can ya do?
Fair enough, I still get urges to self-harm when things are shitty. But nobody ever fully recovers from something like that. And taking into account the severity and frequency of it all it’s amazing how far along the road I’ve traveled. And yeah, depression still hits, but that’s never going to go away. It’s just something that you just got to learn to deal with.
If anyone of you out there felt as I did. Feeling like shit all the time, making out lists as to why people would be better off without you around, hopeless with no motivation or anything. Just hang in there. Go for that extra push to get out of the hole you’re in. It’s hard, it’s probably the hardest thing you’ll ever do. But trust me, it’s worth it.
Feelings do change, things get better. And you really deserve to be alive to see it happen.